Experiencing the Joy by Stephanie Perry Moore

Author:Stephanie Perry Moore [Moore, Stephanie Perry]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-57567-328-8
Publisher: Moody Publishers
Published: 2009-02-15T00:00:00+00:00

This isn’t my fault, Alyssa!” I shouted through my tears as my cousin leaned over her mom’s body.

She looked back and shouted, “Yes, it is! If you would’ve stayed out of my business and let me do what I was doing, this wouldn’t have happened. You could’ve helped me raise some money so I could take some of the stress off my mom. Then she wouldn’t be here lying on the floor right now. I hate you, Yasmin!”

Those strong words made me hate myself. Was all of this really my fault? Though I wanted to take up for myself, was that even possible? How could I justify my actions? If I hadn’t brought my aunt over here, she wouldn’t have known that Alyssa was involved in illegal activity. My heart sank to my feet.

“Aw, man I can’t get busted. Shoot, I’m on parole,” Mr. Smith confessed before he grabbed his keys and dashed out the door.

Frustrated and sad I dialed 911 then silently prayed, “Lord, I just don’t understand. I love You and I’m trying to do right, but everywhere I go and everywhere I turn, it seems like everyone I love is going through something that’s life threatening. I feel so worthless. Even when I do the right thing, I’m not smart enough to keep my nose out of places where it just doesn’t belong. Fix this, Lord. Fix the mess I’ve made, and I promise I’ll go to my room, to a shell somewhere. I won’t come out, I won’t talk to anybody, I won’t mess with anybody, I won’t do anything. Just help me, please. Help my aunt. Amen.

It wasn’t long before the ambulance came and the rescue workers were able to revive her. Alyssa shot me looks that were so eerie. I knew she didn’t want me anywhere around but I could not leave. I couldn’t go anywhere. Not only did I not have any other place to go, but I had to make sure my aunt was going to be okay.

Contrary to whatever Alyssa thought, I cared. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen and I wasn’t going to go away until I knew it was all good. When Alyssa got up and went into another room I followed her. I had never seen my tough cousin sob so badly.

“She’s going to be okay,” I said to her.

“Yeah, but I’m blaming you. Though I know my mom catching me stealing was too much for her. You’re such a good girl. I shouldn’t have involved you in this.”

What was Alyssa saying? Was she all of a sudden taking it back that I had done this to my aunt? Was she really now owning up to her part in all of this? Was God trying to tell me that I did do the right thing by revealing what was going on?

“I’m so angry at you for bringing her over here, Yasmin. I am, but I’m even madder at myself. My mom didn’t want me involved in crime.

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